In A Bookish, Quilty Mood

  Jawbreaker candy that illustrates my current state of body and mind. Physically, emotionally, mentally.... Are there any other ways to be roughed up? Not spiritually, because only in that sense am I feeling like my feet are on the ground. It's a weird Sunday, but hey, sometimes they happen. Occasionally it's a bad Monday. Or a wild Tuesday, or discombobulated Wednesday or.... You get the drift, in that at times life feels HARD. Unpleasant. Frustrating. Wearying, etc, etc, etc. I need some ice cream, or a strong drink. Ice cream is better, lol, and now that the sun is shining, perhaps it's time to scoop up some Ben & Jerry's Phish Food. No gluten in that, just small chocolate fish amid delicious chocolate ice cream and plenteous marshmallow filling. Yeah, I'm going to retrieve that, then return here. Okay, that was delicious, maybe not nutritionally satisfying.... But I'm in a mood today, feeling overwhelmed and grateful, lonely and uplifted, mildly disgust...

  Not to give away spoilers, but in revising The Timeless Nature of Patience , the sixth Alvin's Farm book, I was stunned to find how much of my family's history was included. Veiled yes, but pertinent. Especially in the wake of my mom's passing, which occurred six years ago on the upcoming solstice.  What I realize now, a good dozen years after I wrote the above passage, is mostly due to what Mom told me shortly before she died. How she prayed for all of her kids to not make the same mistakes in life she did. What's especially poignant is that three of us five weren't her biological offspring, me included. Yet she thought of us as hers, although my natural brother disliked her intently. Much as Tanner hated Alana, my brother Joe loathed our stepmom. She knew it, loved him anyways. When Mom shared her insights, she didn't differentiate between her natural children, her sons, her daughters. We were five, although Joe was dead by then. Yet she still loved him. Wh...